My Shaman King Fic

[Jr.]

Okay. This story takes a while and this intro part doesn't really get into the Shaman thing much, but it gets better. I hope!!! Anyways, enjoy!
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Chapter 1- The Betrayal

“I’ve got you now Arin! There is no escape from me this time my friend!” Shin Lei has gotten that look on his face again. That look he always gets when he knows he has conquered his foe. His face gets this little smirk and he grins like he is about to put you out of your misery. I look around for any means of escape. Something, anything that could get me out of that mess. But alas, Shin Lei has me cornered and with no way out. “Fine Shin Lei! You win. Checkmate!!” I lay my king down in defeat. “That makes me the winner best two out of three Arin. You clean the sidewalk!!” “It’s not fair Shin Lei,” I protest, “You have always been the better chess player.” “Then you should stop challenging me.” He grins tossing me the broom, “You know I am better and you should just do your work and stop wasting both our times.” I smile, roll my eyes, and begin my chores.

Although I loathe losing to Shin Lei time and time again, sweeping does give me time to think. Think about my future. It’s been three years since I decided to become an assassin. It’s just too unfortunate that not many people are looking for anyone with those kind of talents. This is Beijing but I have not done anything outrageous in my life. If I could somehow get noticed by the Tao family or anyone in that line of work for the Emperor, I would be set for life. I know my skills still need fine tuning, but I just know I would be great.

Suddenly I turn around. I could have sworn that I was being watched just now. I laugh to myself. “Listen to me. Thinking I am being stalked. Why would anyone want to come after me?” Of course I didn’t realize that someone was not only watching, but has been for a long time.

After we close our store, Shin Lei locks up and says to me, “Tomorrow then?” “Yes. Yes. I will see you then.” We part ways and I only wish I had known that that was the last time I was going to see Shin Lei.

I reach my home to find a strange note pinned to the door by a shuriken:

“Arin,

You have been chosen by the Tao family to do a special job for the Emperor. We need your skills and expertise. If you agree then put this note on the table. If not, then stick the note back on the wall as you left it.

Fang”

Who was Fang? I had no idea what this was about and I nearly put the note back, when I realize what it meant. Someone, namely this Fang, is waiting in the shadows for my response. If I decline the offer I am a dead man. I decide to accept the offer and place the note on the table.

“Rats! I was hoping I could have some fun tonight!” Fang jumps down from my rooftop. He is, of course dressed entirely in black. He reveals his hood so I can see his face. He seems normal enough with his short hair tied behind his head in a small ponytail. He has a gash on his right cheek. Probably from the business he conducts. “Well,” he begins, “I am Fang. I do not quite understand why I have been chosen to watch you for these past 2 years, but I guess I will finally get my answer. Let’s go!” I stop suddenly. “Do I need anything?” “No. Now hurry up.” Fang says already losing his patience with me.

As we journey I dream about what awaits me if I please the Tao’s. I have heard rumors that they dabble in some sort of magic abilities. Maybe if I am able to please them, they could train me in their magical arts.

We reach the Emperor’s palace and I am greeted by the guards. They have a strange presence about them that makes me nervous. Finally, we reach our destination: The Tao family’s residence. “Let’s go. We haven’t got all night. I will be punished if we take too long.” Fang, as pleasant as when we departed pushes me through the doorway.

As I enter the room where my recruiter resides, I am amazed to see all the relics and ancient writings that greet me. The room is lit only by the fire in the fireplace. The man is wearing the symbols of the Tao family all over his robes. He looks so majestic as he sits by the fireplace in this darkened room. “Welcome Arin,” the old man begins, “As head of the guards and the Tao family I greet you.” “Why am I here…..” I begin. “SILENCE!!” Fang shouts as he smacks the back of my head. “That’s enough Fang. He deserves to know why we brought him here.” The old man tells me how Shin Lei has made quite an acquisition a few years ago. Shin Lei did tell me about a special “good luck” talisman that he won at an auction year’s back. That must be what they want. “We know you have some minor assassin skill, but we need you to help us get inside.” The old man continues, “You have worked for Shin Lei for many years and you also know your way around his security. He keeps his store locked up very tight and we have been unable to get inside. We do not wish to cause a ruckus since his store is in a very lively area. We don’t wish to reveal ourselves to the public. Can we count on your assistance in this matter?”

I, taking all of this in so suddenly, am stunned to reply. My friend Shin Lei, or my dreams. The old man, sensing my hesitation, coerces me further, “There is a possible opening for a Tao family assassin, if you decide to assist us.” That clinched it. Working for the Tao family? I would take that in a heartbeat. Fang looked less than pleased with the man’s offer, “You are going to offer this nobody a spot in the Tao family, while I have served you loyally for years?” “Calm down Fang,” the old man begins, “The family has its decision and we want Arin!” Fang’s eyes narrow as he glares at me.

As we journey back to Shin lei’s shop, I was told that I would just show us how to get in, and they would do the rest. I was not too enthusiastic, part was due to the fact that I am betraying my friend, and the other was the fact that I am just a lackey. I was actually hoping to showcase my skills to the group that accompanied me. Fang didn’t seem to care. He just resented me for my good fortune.

We get to the shop and I am about to reveal the secret entrance when I stop. I guess when it came down to it, I couldn’t betray my friend. Shin Lei and I have been together for too long. I just couldn’t do this to him.

“I’m sorry. I just can’t go through with this.” I cannot believe I just said that. Fang rolls his eyes and peers through the opening beside me. “I see what he’s hiding. Let’s go and get this over with.”

I block their path. “Noone is going to go in.” That was my last mistake. I suddenly feel the sharp prick of a knife going through my spine. Everything goes numb and I fall to the ground. The last thing my living ears hear is, “Now the spot in the Tao family belongs to me.” The next thing I notice is I am looking into the eyes of the old man of the Tao family.

“You have done well Arin.” He says. Fang cannot believe what he is hearing, “He is dead. He betrayed you and tried to stop our efforts. I had to kill him before he caused a commotion.” The old man replies, “Fang. You may never understand what it is the Tao family does. Arin here, has done us a valuable service. We still have use for his services. Even in death.” The man sends Fang away. I am wondering how he can see my spirit seeing as how I am dead. I look down and see my corpse. How could I let something like this happen? Just when I am about to cross over the old man speaks again. “You have earned your spot in the Tao family. Congratulations!” “How can you see me?” I ask.

“We are a race of doushi’s and shamans.” He explains, “We use spirits to help us do our work. Sometimes it is not enough to be an expert in stealth; you sometimes need the assistance of spirits.” As he explains he takes the talisman that was retrieved from Shin Lei’s store. Oh Shin Lei, I am so sorry. I have betrayed you and never got to apologize.

My spirit suddenly feels like it is being pulled into my body. “You will now serve the Tao family as a kyounshi. May I again congratulate you on your promotion Arin! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

The last thing I see is the old man laughing and then everything going dark. What has become of me?

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I already have more of this written, but I figure this post is too long already. I wish to thank LC for the inspiration. I will post more of this story later. Let me know what you guys think. I know I’m kinda lacking on the details part. I tried to compensate.

[Ren]

Ok im only in midstory but so far it looks pretty good.

[Jr.]

yeah it's kinda long, but I wanted to get to the interesting part and as I wrote it, the intro just got longer and longer. My continuation will probably be in shorter pieces.

[Lord Cyber]

Wow! That was a light-read for as long as it was...Saturn told me it would be a light-read yesterday and I was like, "but it's so long..."

I promise to only poke you with a sharp stick a few times since you asked for my critique of your work.

poke
Hey! There's only an intro here! But you knew that...

Great job on spelling! I thought for sure I was going to catch you on misspelled words but I didn't find any as I read through...

Yesterday Saturn mentioned that your perspective was wierd...I was like, "Is it first, second, or third?". She said, "first" and I was like, "my story was in first..." but then I tried reading late last night and stumbled on the opening paragraph about four times...you are writing in first person, present-tense instead of past-tense which is kind of odd...it made the story feel urgent and flow really fast from the third paragraph on, but somehow it made me stumble through the first two as I tried to make the necessary connections. It's like starting a war story with, "Their I am..." instead of "Their I was..."

poke
Chess? This was the only part in the entire story that sounded out of place to me...even the name Arin sounds perfectly plausible in a Historical-Chinese-Shaman-King-setting. You should look at Japanese Shogi, or Xiang Qi.
www.tradgames.org.uk/games/Chess.htm

Other than that, you got me at the end, I was like, "hah hah hah, greed...and then they'll kill him...oh hell, he has a conscience!" I figured he was going to get betrayed after he opened the door...I like the idea of him becoming a Kyounshi...that seems a worse fate than dying...it's not like you can hide in public, or even go out in public, heck...and that whole removal of free will thing...

poke
I'm poking you again for this only being an intro. I can't really comment on the story since you've only just begun it ;)

I like the limited description style...I do the same thing...let my readers fill in the gaps on what people look like instead of spending chapters describing them...

All in all a good start!

Oh shoot! I forgot two things:
Double check where you're placing your commas. The line, If I could somehow get noticed by the Tao family or anyone in that line of work for the Emperor, I would be set for life. should either be written with no commas or another comma after the word "family".

And this last one is one I botch alot too. If a new speaker starts talking, start a fresh paragraph.

"Like this?" Jr. quickly asked.

"Yup." LC replied. "And if I'm still the speaker, I can still keep the same paragraph--"

"But if I start talking..."

"Then we switch to a new paragraph and the readers can easily follow who's talking. Exactly!"

LC

[Jr.]

Thanks a lot LC!! I wrote the story in word so I was able to check the spelling. There were a few grammer errors that I just said pfft: Noone would notice.

I try to add more details and descriptions for characters like Fang. I really didn't feel comfortable writing his description. I'm no good at details.

I just started batting this idea around in my head. I already have like three or four small chapters written in my head. I will probably write the next part tomorrow.

I would tell you what I am planning but that would ruin the suprise.

Oh yes and the chess thing. That was just to get your attention. It was supposed to be a whole what is going on thing. Then you were supposed to go OH they were just playing a game.

I'm not going for historical accuracy or anything. If I am incorrectly referencing a date it's just because I'm lazy and I just tell myself it's fiction so just write it you pansy!!

Thanks for the remarks again LC!!

And I realize that the remark of knowing that was the last time I would see Shin Lei was horribly out of place. The story was originally supposed to be past tense like I was recalling my past while wittling away the years as a kyonshi. Guess I got swept away while typing and didn't realize it was present tense. Oh well.

[Ashil]

you have good writing talents bro, keep up the good wrok.

[Jr.]

I decided to label my posts with Chapters. Enjoy! Oh yes, I wish to keep the orignal names, but I like Len better than Ren. Ren alwasy reminds me of Stimpy!! ;D
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Chapter 2- Reflection

How long have I been here? I would have thought that 400 or so years would have made my memory go, but it still seemed like yesterday when I was killed by Fang. I have been locked away in some vault for what seems like eternity. Only on rare occasions have I been called upon to do my master’s bidding. Simple killings have not brought me any joy. Since my body is being controlled, I just sit here wasting away in this rotten corpse. Every time I am called it’s by a new master but they are always a Tao. Just recently I was awakened by Tao En. He and his wife Ran have two children called Len and Jun. I was given to Jun by En as a birthday present, but she only cares about Li Pailong her bodyguard. Len is a shaman and my first task was to go and scout his battle with Asakura Yoh. Not that I have much choice since the talisman I helped the Tao’s acquire is on my forehead and it does all my movements.

I reached Funbari in what seemed like no time at all. Jun had everything arranged. I almost wouldn’t mind working for her, if it weren’t for the fact that she treats us like mere puppets. I would be angry about this, but I feel that I have gotten what I deserve. My greed cost me my life and now I will pay for eternity as a puppet to some doushi. I was told to go to the park and watch the fight between Len and Asakura Yoh and report back when Len is victorious.

I reach the park just in time to see the battle begin. Len moves flawlessly and easily overpowers Asakura Yoh. Len’s spirit Bason seems to be a much more powerful warrior. I wish I could have been a more powerful person, then I would have been able to see the err of my ways and I could have stopped Fang and the Tao’s from killing me and robbing Shin Lei’s store. I remember speaking to Fang along the way to the Tao’s compound and he just seemed interested in one thing. Becoming a shaman. I had no idea what he meant since I had no idea what a shaman was at the time. Now I see that a shaman is a most powerful warrior indeed as Asakura Yoh barely dodges one of Len’s attacks. Fang told me that I was a nobody, and that the Tao family only recruits the strongest warriors from China to join them. I should have known right then and there that I was being set up. I was not strong enough to join the Tao’s. I had to be ruthless like Fang. Len unleashes his spirits strength and Asakura falls. This should end soon….what is that? A man on some foreign machine arrives and scoops up Asakura Yoh and flees. Master Len is most displeased with this and turns to face me. That means I must take my leave as my body jerks me back towards Jun’s residence.

Upon returning I am once again placed in my coffin until I am needed again. This is not what I wanted when I wished to serve the Tao family, but this is what I deserved. Oh, Shin Lei, how I wish I could tell you how sorry I am for betraying you. I have yet to finish paying for my deeds, but perhaps one day my spirit can finally rest. Perhaps, one day, I will be able to see you in the spirit world and tell you how sorry I am.

Days pass and I am awakened again by Jun. It seems that Len had lost his rematch with Asakura Yoh and I am to go to his residence and kill him myself. I figured that this would be easy until I notice that there are some empty coffins. I learn from overhearing Len and Jun speak that some of her kyonshi were defeated by this Asakura Yoh. Perhaps this will be my most difficult fight yet.

I reach his residence and as I fly through the bushes outside I spy another shaman washing dishes in the window. This one is different. Aside from the blue hair, he does not have a guardian spirit. This one has a living spirit at his side. I clumsily trip on a rock and quickly hide in the nearest bush. I look to the window to see the boy missing. I know he must have noticed me. I blame myself even though the talisman controls my movement. I just seem to mess everything up. The boy is following me. Perhaps I will have to kill him as well. The talisman says to only go after Yoh. This boy is just in the way.

He chases me further and now my fellow kyonshi and I are given the command to attack the boy. Then I spy Asakura Yoh and a few others with him. They must be his friends. I see the one who rescued Asakura Yoh is with them. Oh how I wish to have had friends. My only friend was Shin Lei and he was betrayed by me. So I guess I should remain alone. Anyone who wishes to become my friend would just end up getting hurt by my selfishness and greed. The tall one with a strange hair style attacks the boy in blue. I am given the order to attack the tall one whose name I believe is Ryu. I strike with my claw nearly cutting him through. He escapes my swipe with a nice cut on his stomach. He’ll survive though. Now the two shaman team up on my fellow kyonshi. The blue one whose name I believe is Horo Horo attacks me with his icicles. His icicle assault freezes me and my talisman tears.

I am at last free from the control of the talisman and I feel my spirit rising to the spirit world. Perhaps I will finally be able to confront Shin Lei and end my suffering. As I ascend to the spirit plane I hear a voice echoing through the sky. “Follow the sound of my voice” It seems that someone is calling for me. I see blue beads in the distance. My spirit is being pulled through the night and I black out. The next thing I know I am face to face with a young girl. A boy in the corner who I can only assume is a medium is holding his blue beads in the corner. He is the one responsible for bringing me here.

“Hello Arin!” the girl cheerfully greets me. I am hesitant to reply. I have not spoken for over 400 years. What would I say?

“How about hello?” an old man walks into the room. He seems to be a master in those shaman arts. So much so that he can read minds. How else could he have been able to know what I was thinking?

“He….hello,” I hear myself stupidly say. What could they possibly want with me?

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Okay I am beginning to get to the heart of the story if you haven’t figured it out yet. I haven’t thought of all of the names yet which is why I left out introductions. I will post more later in the week. Man the ideas just flow out of my head like a fountain when I write sometimes. Other times like research papers, I just can’t get anything out. Thanks for reading and let me know what you think.

[Jr.]

Oh and LC about the point of view in the first chapter I would like to say that I actually was a bit confused myself on how I was going to represent Arin. I thought I cleaned it up, but I noticed after I read it, that I was switching between first and third.

Glad I noticed that much at least.

EDIT: I just noticed a huge flaw in my timeline. Jun would not have sent kyonshi after Yoh in the Horo Horo ep. since Yoh has already liberated Jun and Li Pailong. The kyonshi were sent by En. I would change it, but I'm too lazy.

[Saturn]

There are some spots where you need to put in commas to break the sentences. A couple spots I had to reread to figure out how the sentence were suppose to be read because without the commas it made no sense....ARRGGG *runs to turn off furnace*

That thing wants to heat the place to 90...I swear.

Where was I...oh yes.

The first person, present tense is still messing me up. For some odd reason I just can't get used to it.

As for the story itself, I'm really enjoying it. I will be awaiting the next chapter.

[Jr.]

This one is kinda long again. I just don't know when to end it. I think it ended a bit too abrupt, but I'll let you decide. Enjoy!
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Chapter 3- A Second Chance

“It’s great to finally meet you Arin! My name is Kierian”, the girl introduces herself. She then turns to the boy in the corner. “Don’t be shy Khoren. Introduce yourself. You are the one who summoned him anyway!”

“Uh…..hi. My name’s Khoren”, the boy timidly speaks to me. “Kierian is right about me summoning you. I used my beads to call to your spirit. You see……”, Khoren stops suddenly looking to the old man in the corner.

“Oh, yeah! I forgot to introduce you to my sensei! Arin. Meet my sensei. Master Dashi”, Kierian runs to the old man standing behind her.

“Hello Master Dashi, I am Arin……..or at least that was my name.” I am no longer the man I once was. Ever since I betrayed Shin Lei, I have lost my identity. Master Dashi’s eyes narrow as he watches me. I forgot that he can read minds. He must sense my total doubt in myself.

“I want you to be my partner for the tournament Arin”, Kierian tells me.

“What tournament?” I have no idea what she is talking about.

“You are a powerful ninja spirit and no one has told you about the Shaman Tournament?” Kierian looks puzzled at me. She must not know what I have been doing since my death. Perhaps it’s best not to divulge that information at the moment.

“No. I haven’t heard of the tournament. I haven’t been keeping up on current events lately. Would you mind explaining it to me?” I know that Master Dashi can see right through my façade. Why hasn’t he said anything yet?

“Well,” Kierian begins, “the Shaman Tournament takes place every 500 years. Shamans from all over the world take part in battles to determine who is the one that can claim the Master of Spirits. That shaman is then crowned Shaman King……or Queen in my case.” Kierian continues to cheerfully smile. Why do I have the feeling that she is hiding something? Master Dashi gets a startled look about him and quickly speaks:

“If you are going to enter the tournament, you and your guardian ghost must get started on your training. Due to Arin’s late arrival, you have very little time to prepare for the qualifying round.” Guardian ghost? Kierian conveniently left that part out of her explanation. But she quickly covers it:

“That’s right. Every shaman has a spirit that helps them in their battles. I have been working on my stealth abilities Arin. With your abilities added to mine, there is no way we can lose!! Let’s go!!” Kierian runs out the door. I feel like I have yet to learn all there is to this shaman tournament. I follow her outside to see what she was so excited about. I get my answer as soon as I exit her home.

Kierian is standing by some wooden targets in a field. Seeing me, she waves me over. I come up to her and that is when I realize what I am here for:

“Spirit Form!!! UNITY!!!!” I suddenly get the same feeling I had when I was drug into my corpse by the Tao’s talisman. Then I see a blinding light that hurts my eyes. Hurts my eyes. I feel pain? I actually feel the sunlight on me. I open my eyes to an empty field. I do not see Kierian anywhere.

“Where are you Kierian?” I wonder what happened to her.

“I’m right here Arin! Is this the first time you have been called on by a shaman?” Kierian is surprised to find out that this is my first time teaming up with a shaman.

“This is a new experience for me Kierian. It is a strange feeling to actually be able to feel the earth under my feet and feel the sun on my face.” The sun’s warmth feels so welcoming.

“Well, let’s get started. In order for us to make full use of our abilities, we will need to move as one. If we can achieve perfect unity, then we will be unstoppable. Ready Arin? We need to destroy each of those targets in the field.” I am surprised at Kierian’s tone. It went from being overly cheerful to very serious. It seems that I have already underestimated her. Kierian begins to move, “Attack!!!” We move along the field towards the first target. I feel the dagger on my hip, and I pull and swing it destroying the first target. “Next one!!” Kierian yells as we continue towards the next target. I pull out a shuriken and we throw with perfect sync and we hit the next target dead center. “Last one!!” I hear Kierian yell as we draw our katana to slash the final target to bits. This is easy. I guess all the work I did for the Tao family did something for me after all.

Kierian trips and we fall to the ground before the last target. I was heading towards the target with full conviction, but Kierian has gone cold. I feel our unity slipping away and I am suddenly floating over her again.

“Tao…..” was all I heard her say.

“What has happened Kierian? Are you okay?” I heard her say Tao. How did she know about my past? Master Dashi and Khoren come walking up from the house. Master Dashi explains:

“When a shaman and spirit are in unity, the thoughts of the spirit and shaman are unified as well. Your thoughts are heard by her just as you can hear hers. You probably didn’t hear anything from her because when she is in battle, Kierian has been taught to only think about that fight. Any distractions can result in what happened here today.” Master Dashi’s eyes narrow again.

“Why Arin”, Kierian begins, “Why didn’t you tell me you were working for the Tao family? What were you?” Kierian’s voice increases in volume, “A ghost to Len? One of his throw away spirits that he didn’t want? Tell me Arin!!!! TELL ME!!!”

“I WAS A KYONSHI!!! Okay?” I hear myself yelling at the girl. Tears running down her face, she gets up and looks into my eyes. “I was murdered by a Tao family assassin and used by the Tao’s as a kyounshi to Tao Jun! I was merely a puppet. I was confined to my dead body for eternity. I apologize for not telling you. I had no idea you even knew who the Tao family was.” Kierian continues to look at me and she looks at her feet.

“I’m sorry Arin. I haven’t been fully truthful with you either,” Kierian begins, “You are not exactly my first guardian ghost. I was training for the tournament one day with my previous spirit. Then Tao Len shows up. He challenges me to a shaman battle and I accept. The battle was over pretty quick and I saw just how powerful Len really is. I never stood a chance. That was when his sister came up to me and sealed my guardian ghost in one of her doushi talismans. The last thing I saw of my ghost was his voice telling me to seek you out. Ever since then, I have been in search of you Arin. I should have known you weren’t working for them voluntarily. Fang wouldn’t have had me search you out, if you were evil.”

Did she just say Fang?

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WOoooooo! Just kidding! I'll have more as I write it. Kierian is a name my wife always uses when we play RPG's so I decided to go with that. Khoren is a name I use every once in a while too. Anyone who watches Xiaolin Showdown knows where Dashi came from. I just liked the name.

[Lord Cyber]

The easiest way to do this is to go straight down the chapters...

I'm at Chapter 2, paragraph 1:
I would have said rotting corpse instead of rotten...I like the idea of it decomposing around him and he can't do anything about it.

Oh hell yeah! The talisman he stole is now on his head! Nice! I'm already hooked on chapter 2 within the first paragraph...masterfully done on the talisman...it feels like you're more into this chapter than you were the first....

You flipped back and forth from present tense to past tense during the second paragraph...now where did I put that stick...
poke

Good ending to the chapter...it hit at a good time...I was just about to start complaining about Arin's self-loathing, but he hadn't quite hit my threshold yet...and I didn't expect the ending either...I don't remember Arin being that old so young girl is a really young girl in my mind's eye.

Chapter 3...darn, I just asked Saturn who Master Dashi was...Xaolin Showdown...

I like Master Dashi...but everyone else (besides Arin) is starting to feel gray...there's nothing that makes them stand out.

You're very good at ending chapters on a teaser.

It does feel like you've lost focus some...chapter 2 held me and chapter 3 was...well...alot of dialog to read...

Will Arin's tale be a short story or are you looking at taking it farther? How deep into the story do you feel you are?

I had this thought the other day of taking the base of your story with all the character names, and writing it in my style to see how similar and different it would be, see if you'd get a kick out of it too...but I'd have to ask permission first to do that!

LC

[Jr.]

I'm still creating more plot branches for this story. It's starting to turn into a series.

Kierian is supposed to be around yoh's age I guess. Young teenager. Mature for her age, I guess she is really a female version of Yoh. I gotta try to branch away from SK. I want this series to be original. That's why I chose a female shaman for Arin. Arin is supposed to be around 20 or 21. An adult but still very impressionable.

I need to proofread better, perhaps have my wife read it before posting. The creator is always the last to notice his mistakes. (pokes self with stick)

Feel free to make your own story with my characters. I hope you don't do plotlines that I am already planning though.

I guess if this gets to be too long of a story, I could just post a link to my site and leave this thread for reviews. I haven't uploaded my fic to my site but I plan to in the future.

But again, I am very deep into this story and have a lot of ideas on where it will be going. Khoren and Kireian will be given their own spotlights, but I want this story to focus more on Arin and his struggle within himself. I believe he will finally find peace but, if I have my way, it will be a very torturous road.

[Jr.]

In case anyone is wondering of I'm going to continue this fic, I will be after christmas. I have three volumes of SK manga under the tree since my wife won't let me have them until then.

I would like to know more about the prolouge of Shaman King before I continue my story. I would like to be at least as accurate as I can with my fic.

[SquallHeartilly]

This is really good. I hope you'll post the next chapter soon.

I was wondering if you're registered a fanfiction.net. If you are, I'd like to see some of your other fics, Jr.

[Jr.]

I've been working on the next chapter for about a month and I've hit kind of a block, but I plan to get past it soon. I'm undecided on a few ways to take this story in the next chapter.

Thanks for the praise and no, I am not registered at any fanfiction sites. This is my first go at fic writing to be completely honest. I'm very flattered though!!! ;D