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Post by taoren33 on Dec 27, 2004 22:58:14 GMT -5
This is poetry written from the perspectives of Horo Horo and Ren, and it is RenHoro/HoroRen, so don't say I didn't warn you... This is a poem about the consequences of seemingly unrequited love. Enjoy!
Venemous Devotion This is torture. Life, without truly living. Love, Without truly loving. I am incapable Of feeling. This is torture. You poisoned me. Venom Dripping from your smile, The cheerful grin I loathe. Oozing from your laugh, Sincere and free, so open. You idiot. So naïve. So oblivious. You poisoned me. I can’t think. I can’t breathe. I can’t live. But I can’t hide. Your friendship is going to kill me. I long for something more. I can’t trust myself to withold my lust. For you. It’s poisoning me. I see you when I close my eyes. I see you in my dreams. Is there a time when you are not on my mind, Draining my energy, Poisoning me? I think not. And you know nothing. As always. You’d mock me: THE Tao Ren, In love? Bastard. You won’t, You can’t Understand. You imbecile. You fool. You poisoned me. I hate you, and yet, I love you. - Tao Ren |
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Post by taoren33 on Dec 27, 2004 23:01:23 GMT -5
I think that the effort I put into this stuff is finally paying off! I don't know how to describe it... Inspired by an awesome one-shot I read on fanfiction.net.
You Can't This is torture. Love, Unconditional, unrequited. Are you blind? Unable to see how I struggle To show you. To prove myself to you. This is torture, Seeking your approval, Desperately. You only strike against me. That will never change. I conceal myself behind A facade of smiles. Teasing you, Merely to veil my wounded soul. I’m dying. Yet I’m not melancholy, Nor enraged. I cherish this pain, inflicted by you. Dizzy with my blissful suffering. I’m your bitch, remember? I live for this hurt, I adore it. I’d go to hell and back for you. You wouldn’t care. You couldn’t. Not now, Not ever. What do you hide from the world? Is there anyone who truly knows you? Not me. Not even yourself. What do you fear? I long to know you. To unravel the very essence Of your being. What do you see When you close your eyes? Hell, I love this. This ache, eternal. This throbbing agony, I endure Faithfully. I live for this everlasting pain, As long as it comes from you, I embrace it, Masochistic as that seems. This suffering is Pure pleasure. I am desperate for your attention, Waves of delight overcome me when you Rip into me. I can't ever tell you why I still cope with this misery. I will wait until you are ready. Ready to hear the truth. I will continue to linger. I always have. I always will. I will smile for you. I will frown. I will laugh for you. I will cry. I will breath for you. I will suffocate. I will stand for you. I will fall. I will fight for you. I will speak for you. I will hold my tongue. I will need you. I will want you. I will scream. I will dream. I will reach for you. I will draw away. I will trust for you. I will doubt. I will help for you. I will hinder. I will question. I will accept. I will give for you. I will take. I will save you. I will kill you. I will persevere. I will surrender. I will be true. I will fake. I will hate. I will love. I will die for you. I will live for you. Because you can’t. You can't. Do it for me. For anyone. For yourself. You can't. - Horokeu Usui |
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Post by nielrian on Dec 28, 2004 17:44:15 GMT -5
Wow, those are really good! You even took the time to put the two dots above the word "naive", like I never do. XD
I like the emotions that you put into it. Very... I can't really explain it, but awesome!
Anyway, great all around!
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Post by taoren33 on Dec 29, 2004 19:07:46 GMT -5
Third poem I wrote, originally titled Tip of My Tongue. Ren's struggle to conceal his feelings for Horo.
Restrained Expressions I saw you today. You laughed. At me. Hard. The words were on the Tip of my tongue. I want you to hear them. I want you to know. But there are thoughts, Dreams. Which must stay with me. In my mind And heart. Words I will never whisper in your ear, Never hear from you in return. On the tip of my tongue. I bit it. And I tasted blood. This was not The first time I have been injured on your account. I will suffer for you But I love it. I pursue what I cannot have. I want you. But I hide. Hide behind insults, Hurled with spite. Hide behind aggression, Physical assaults. The words lie in wait. Always on the tip of my tongue. I yearn to touch you. But with passion. Without inflicting pain. You called me names. Joking, poking fun. The words were there, too. Reaching out. Eager to show you What they wanted. What I wanted. What I needed. Desperately. To demonstrate my burning desires. Wipe that stupid smirk off your idiotic face. And yet the words couldn’t come. Caught in my throat. On the tip of my tongue. I choked them back. I spluttered, but I won. I possess the power to control my own emotions. The words are still with me. -Tao Ren
Not bad for a twelve-year old girl, ne? ;D Thanks, Nielrian for reviewing! Can you make me a cool signature tag like yours? It's so cool!!!   Twenty-seven people look at this and don't tell me if the love/hate/are offended/annoyed/pissed off by these poems? This is the first poetry I've written outside of school, where we must write: Roses are red, violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, You suck! |
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Innle
Senior Shaman
A paper moon can be real enough, with a little belief...
Posts: 309
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Post by Innle on Dec 29, 2004 19:27:37 GMT -5
You're TWELVE? Damn, this is good...much better than the drivel they print in my highschool's "newspaper" (read: senior mouthpiece). You capture emotion well...but I do have one small complaint. The use of a japanese word in a poem that's in english is jarring beyond belief. I'm not saying I'm above it myself (I once included the spanish for what turned out to be "I like the toilet" in a poem for the sake of rhyme scheme), but...it's just jarring and throws off the flow of your free verse.
If that came off as a flame, I didn't mean it to! I'm not good at constructive criticism....
-Innle
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Post by taoren33 on Dec 30, 2004 0:06:19 GMT -5
Innle: Thanks for your critisism, that's what I asked for! ;D You know, I would probably have been offended by that, had there not been a bunch of praise and compliments before it. I actually appreciate reviewers who suggest modifications to my work rather than:
RenHoro Fan (a person I made up): Wow! Great!
flamer666 (an actual person who reported all yaoi stories on fanfiction.net, who promptly banned those authors and deleted said stories): THIS SUX, ROT IN HELL, *****! YOU SHOULD BE FRIED IN YOUR OWN URINE...
Anyway, I edited them, fixed now!
Thanks Innle!
Others (read: 38 people excluding myself, Nielrian, and Innle): Review, please!
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CrystalStar
Full Fledged Shaman
Mirelle-chan~!
Posts: 229
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Post by CrystalStar on Dec 30, 2004 14:06:06 GMT -5
flamer666 (an actual person who reported all yaoi stories on fanfiction.net, who promptly banned those authors and deleted said stories): THIS SUX, ROT IN HELL, *****! YOU SHOULD BE FRIED IN YOUR OWN URINE... I've actually seen this person's reviews and I think this guy is horrible!  Anyway, the poems are good. This must have took a while to write. This reminds me of my friend that likes to write poems. |
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Post by taoren33 on Dec 31, 2004 17:40:54 GMT -5
Yeah, but on his livejournal community, yaoihunters, a truce has been established. He will no longer report all shounen-ai stories because of his homophobia. Mission accomplished!
Suprisingly, the poems don't take me long at all! About 15 minutes actually, but longer for Horo POV. His perspective is harder to write from, as opposed to Ren's.
54 people look at this and don't tell me if the love/hate/are offended/annoyed/pissed off by these poems?
54 people who viewed this post (excluding Nielrian, Innle, CrystalStar, and myself): Review!
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Post by taoren33 on Jan 8, 2005 1:00:56 GMT -5
Horo's hidden pain...not much else to say
Deceptions of Reality I saw you today. I felt you beside me. Just once, Could you have a good word for me? Anything that doesn’t sting, Anything that won’t put me down. But the same, sharp tongue Lashes out Putting me down As if you think that Will elevate yourself. You’re smarter than that. What can I do to mask this agony? What more can I say to make you Understand What have you done to me? I don’t recognize this boy I have become I see him, he looks the same But the hollowness The sorrow in his eyes Is not my own. I can’t delve into his emotions. Things used to be so simple Simplicity is naïveté A lie Like you Like your words Tearing me apart What can I do? I can laugh. It hurts My heart aches I can smile It pains me To see you like this But even more to know I can’t Can’t love you Can’t hold you Can’t console you Can’t be with you Can’t erase your pain I can’t. I can laugh. What else is there? Your false pretenses. Shrouded in mystery. Nothing is certain. Knowledge is faint. Change is imminent. Doubt is haunting. You fake. Your words Putting me down. Your arrogance, A farce. What is real? What else can I do? I can laugh. Insincerely, A fabrication Distracting from The infinite pain I feel When I see your own. -Usui Horokeu |
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Post by taoren33 on Jan 8, 2005 16:47:02 GMT -5
This is actually the second poem I've ever written outside of school, right next to Venemous Devotion. Kinda spoiler-ish, BEWARE!
Downfall of Sacrifice Sacrifice. I died for you. Does that mean anything? I would die again. Not many can claim my Eternal loyalty. Is that nothing? Am I nothing? I thought that I was The only shaman needed. Perhaps I always have been, always will be. But I doubt it. Damn you! You’ve led me to doubt Myself. The only person I could trust Above all. Where my elders and So-called superiors failed, I triumphed. I am my own role model. At least, I was. Before you. There are things worse than death. I believe this to be one of them. I sacrificed myself, Not knowing that I would survive, Aware that you would. That was enough. Knowing that you would live at least one moment longer, Because of me. My sacrifice. That was enough for me. It still is. Now, I hate seeing you. Every second is torture. You haunt me. The memory of my sacrifice. The meaning. Lost upon you. Worthless. I died for you. Nothing. I would do so again. Nothing. My sacrifices, selfless. Nothing. My loyalty, unwavering. Nothing. My love, boundless. Nothing. I sacrificed my soul for you. For your life. Nothing. The equivalent of my chances With you. -Tao Ren |
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Post by nielrian on Jan 8, 2005 19:35:22 GMT -5
I cant get enough of these! Awesome, awesome, awesome.
Come on people, its not that hard to drop a review... takes all of 10 seconds.
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Post by taoren33 on Jan 20, 2005 22:31:58 GMT -5
Yeah, this is one I actually like. Somehow it's always worth the agony it takes to write from Horo's perspective... I guess this might be a spoiler for the anime, be forewarned! I can say no more...
Silent Inquiry Sacrifice. I lived for you. The question I will never answer Why? Am I afraid to ask Why did you, Willingly, Throw yourself In front of me, Taking the blows that were meant for me, Shielding me from the pain. You can’t heal my heartache. Life wouldn't have been worth it with you gone. I would have left with you. Why did you risk your life? Why did you risk it for me? It would be easy to ask you, Yet I can’t will myself to question you. I torment myself incessantly. I don’t know why. I can’t know why. Am I afraid to receive your answer? Am I afraid of your response? Yes. I fear that you would let me know, With no uncertain terms, That it was nothing. It will never be nothing. Not to me. Will you dismiss your gesture as Foolishness? Friendship? I long for something more. My elaborate fantasies, Built upon false hopes, Hanging by a single thread, The unsounded question. I am afraid to fall, Knowing you won’t be there to catch me. I am afraid of what you might say- What you will say So I say nothing. My anxiety withheld. Asking myself the same question, Perpetually. Because I can’t bring myself to Interrogate you. I can’t sleep The nagging question- Why? You would reward me, My foolish query, With a reply, It’s meaning distinct You would strike me, Do you think hurting me would Change anything? Make me forget? I can’t. My dripping blood can’t Wash away The memory, The meaning, Of your sacrifice. Of mine. Causing me pain Will only distract you From my question The one I’ll never ask. The sacrifice is Never knowing why. -Usui Horokeu |
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Post by nielrian on Jan 22, 2005 13:35:13 GMT -5
0.0
Another beautiful piece of work. I can never get over how wonderful I think poetry is. ::Sigh:: Anyways, great as always.
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Post by Elba-cakes *coughs* on Jan 22, 2005 13:50:37 GMT -5
This is pretty good stuff...In my opinion, anyways. It makes me wish I could still write poetry >_<
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Post by taoren33 on Jan 23, 2005 20:52:25 GMT -5
I don't really like this poem, but hopefully someone else will. It's basically about Horo's dream, and how he never wants to wake up...yeah, that's about it.
Regained Consciousness Is this a dream? It can’t be, This ecstasy seems authentic. But you’re smiling at me So it must be. Not your usual arrogant smirk, But a small grin, The corners of your mouth Upturned slightly. Extraordinary, Exceptional, Because I’ve never Witnessed this radiance Ever before. And the way you’re smiling at me- At me- Genuinely, not taunting, Neither boasting nor insulting, Is exhilarating. This euphoria, Too good to be true. Your newfound smile, more confident now- Blows me away. This just feels right. This-elation- Yet somehow that title Doesn’t do what I’m experiencing Justice. I don’t want it to end, Not ever. I know that it will. Trying to hold the diminishing moment of bliss. An eternity Untouched by pettiness, By inconsequential matters. Stretching my illusion, Captivated, Deliriously entranced I must tear myself away To face the truth- You will never beam at me- For me- Like this. Tricking myself into believing this Self-deception. And yet I still haven’t Regained consciousness Clinging to this fantasy You smile, And I smile back, Because Despite your lack of experience You smile at me And I know that you could Laugh. -Usui Horokeu |
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Twenty-seven people look at this and don't tell me if the love/hate/are offended/annoyed/pissed off by these poems? 
