Suikoden IV: A retelling >:D (humor/silliness)

[Lovely]

Suikoden IV: a retelling

Notes: For Hero4’s name, I’m calling him “Yon”. Why? Because it means “four”. Hey, it was either that or “ANGRY GLARE BOY” , and that would just be a bit too much to write .

Technically, no knowledge of Suikoden IV is really needed to read this. Basically… I’m just making fun of the whole thing ^_~ . Though going in with Suikoden IV knowledge certainly won't hurt. Oh yeah, and this WILL have spoilers, so don’t say you weren’t warned.

Oh, as a side note, though in the end I didn’t enjoy the game much, I’m not writing this out of spite. I really am writing this in good fun ^_^ .

Oh and uh... there's some language sprinkled here and there. Anyhoo, onwards to the story!



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Out on the high seas, the young Gaien Knight trainee’s proceed with a mock sea battle. Soon they are boarded by the opposing forces and forced into battle. Snowe, the captian for this excercise and his servant/friend and the hero of this tale “Yon” proceed to kick some booty.


Snowe: Ph34R my awesome captain powers XD !

Yon: -_- angry glare….

Snowe: PH34R!

Yon: A-angry glare 0_o; !

Snowe: That’s more like it, now then! You attack “” while I attack “?” .

Yon: angry glare 0_o ? aaaaah… Angry glare! *attacks a random enemy*

Snowe: WHAT DID I JUST SAY? You attacked the wrong one! That’s it, I’m not putting out tonight.

Yon: a…angry glare…. …

*The REAL commander of the Gaien naval fleet boards the ship and challenges our boys to battle.*

Snowe: *attacks Glen*
Snowe: *trips and gets knocked out*

Glen: Ooookaaaaay….

Yon: ANGRY F’IN GLARE!!!

Glen: Holy mother of hades! Your mere ability to stare at me angrily makes me admit defeat!

Yon: *proudly* Angry glare!

Snowe: *groans from his position on the floor*

Glen: *ignores Snowe and continues to congratulate Yon*

Yon: *happily* Angry glare!

Snowe: *gets up* Um… EXCUSE ME! Slightly injured noble here!

Glen: *stares at Snowe*

Yon: *angrily glares at Snowe*

Snowe: Can I get a hug or something…

Glen: Um… how about we try something else *BITCH SLAPS Snowe*

Snowe: Sonofa….!

Glen: Now, as I was saying Yon, today you guys are graduating! Ain’t that nifty keen?

Snowe: soooooo not putting out tonight…

[resurie]

Ahahahaha! XD!! I loved it! Especially when you made Snowe talk in l33t. >D Awesome. Is this just it? Or are you going to continue? o_0

[Lovely]

I have plans to go through the whole "plot" of the game this way actually >D . I've already got a few more installments written out, but I'm going to wait and see how the reaction of everyone is before I go on.

[resurie]

Whoo! Hope everyone else will like it. ^_^ You've inspired me to do something I've been wanting to do... >D *plans it* I won't tell. >D Nyah.

And...I noticed your tagline Lovely. Wow, it must have really been a bad game. XD

[Lovely]

At it's worst, it was horrible, at it's best it was merely average. All in all it was just disapointing. BUT! That's because I have a bias for games that don't have a lot of characterisation. It wasn't a good gaming experience for me due to my personality I suppose.

It had a lot of potential though, hence the reason that there is a good amount to make fun of ^__^ .

Oh yeah, and contrary to how I'm writing this, I actually DO like Snowe ^^; . He's just really, REALLY easy to make fun of.

[Dessa]

I liked 4 better than 1... I just had fun playing.

**hides her file with 38+ hours on it**


Can't wait until you get to Ted...

[Lovely]

This part is short (actually, they are all designed to be fairly short).

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Jewel (One of Yon’s “friends”): OH MY GOD! Tonight is the kindling ritual! A ritual where we celebrate our graduation! And burn things! AWESOME XD .

Snowe: By “burning” things, do you mean Yon? ‘Cause at this point I wouldn’t really mind that…

Yon: A-Angry Glare 0_0 ?

Jewel: Um… no… we burn torches and light some fireworks 0_o …

Snowe: ……

Snowe: Oh….

Snowe: huh.

Yon: ;_;
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[resurie]

Ahaha. XD I don't care for shortness. (that's not a word is it? ) This installment made me laugh. XD

[Lovely]

Heh, well... only Res seems to be reading this but... Ah well ^__^ .

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The graduation goes off without incident and the “Kindling” ceremony begins. The kindling ceremony is where the most elite of the new trainees lights a path of torches until he reaches the main square of the city. Then a great speech is given and the city celebrates the occasion by lighting off a slew of fireworks.

Chiepoo: Excuse me, but If I may interrupt, I just wanna introduce myself, I am a “Nay-Kobold”. I look like a large walking cat, behold my cuteness!

Snowe: Um… your point?

Chiepoo: That’s it ^_^ .

Snowe: Oh. Well… you’ll become important later right?

Chiepoo: Nah, this is pretty much the depth of my characterization ^_^ .

Snowe: Uh huh….

Chiepoo: Pretty much everyone in town is like me, I bet they wouldn’t even notice if your mute friend there lit the torches instead of you.

Snowe: Wha? Oh please *rolls his eyes*.

Chiepoo: $100 potch says I’m right.

Snowe: You’re on!

Yon: Angry glare…

Snowe: Aaah, don’t be like that slave… erm… I mean BUDDIE, I’m letting you light the torches out of friendship! Honest!

Yon:….

Snowe: *sigh* Seriously! Seriously! I mean, SURE you clean up after me and stuff, but, we’re still friends right? I don’t mind you getting a little recognition. I mean, it’s not like your popularity will ever overshadow MINE or anything, right ^_^ ?

Yon: …… angry glare ^_____^ …. (translation: muwahahahaha….)


Despite feeling a bit like a doormat, Yon decides to just enjoy himself and he lights the torches in Snowe’s stead. I mean… FIRE, what’s not to enjoy?

Random village person: *to Yon* My goodness Snowe! You’ve become silent and angry looking haven’t you ^_^ ?

Chiepoo: Pay up goofball :p .

Snowe: dammit >_< !

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[resurie]

I guess no one else is reading it because they don't know Suikoden?? XD Well, I don't...but I find it funny anyway.

Heh, I don't know much about Snowe, but from what you're writing, he does seem easy to make fun of. XD

[Matamune]

xD Well, this is amusing. I would've burning Yon. >3

ANGRY GLARE! xD I didn't play 4...but so Yon is mute..right?

*has a bad experience with most Mute characters*

*coughEphemeralFantasiacough*

[Dessa]

Shujinkou IV (Hero IV) isn't THAT bad... but... in a game where there are voices, it's really weird having a silent hero... I usually don't mind them when it's just text, but...


And Lovely, I'm reading it too!! Didn't you see me asking for Ted?

[Lovely]

The thing that's bad about Hero IV is that he really DOES have a creepy angry glare... ALL THE TIME. Regardless of the situation. It doesn't help that his head is kind of small and his eyes are really wide ^^;.... It's just kind of spooky.



Oh, and I'm glad I have readers ^_^. I'm an attention whore online. Hence the site XD . (I'm kidding! I'm kidding!)

EDIT: It's going to be a while 'till I get to Ted though ^^;. I'm trying to follow the original order of events. So much so that I'm using a GameFAQS faq to help me out a bit ^^ .

[Lovely]

I don't really like this next part. It doesn't flow very well and I think the humor comes off rather flat. I even considered cutting this part but... eh well. I'm posting it anyway. Consider this an easter egg ^^;.

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The ceremony goes well and all is happiness and giggles. OR IS IT?

Chiepoo: Woo hoo! 100 potch! I’m gonna buy a fish ^_^ ! Erm… I mean… HELP, A girl has been kidnapped!

Yon: ANGRY GLARE??!!

Chiepoo: Of course I’m telling the truth! Go that a ways in order to tack some time to this game and gain exper… erm, I mean, save her!

Snowe: Woo~ maiden saving! This will REALLY get everyone in town to love me!

Yon: Angry! Angry glare!

Snowe: Oh! You’re right Yon, we shouldn’t do it for the praise, we should do it for the sense of well being.

Yon: Angry glare!

Snowe: Man… you really need to watch the profanity dude…


--Due to budget constraints and time issues the next scene will be slightly shortened.--

Saved little girl: Thanks for saving me big brothers ^_^ !

Yon: *happily* Angry glare ^_^ .

Snowe: Uh, yeah… whatever… c’mon Yon, lets go to bed already *winks*.

Yon: Angry glare 0_o ?

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[Dessa]

**pokes lovely**

umm... continue? It's been 3 days!!

**runs away before lovely shoots her**