Post by Papaya-chan on Jun 23, 2005 15:08:49 GMT -5
Mankin Interviews!
Chapter one.
Audience: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!! KELSEY! SHELLY! ALYSSA!
Three girls run to the center stage and the crowd goes wild. A short girl with green eyes, glasses, and shoulder length blonde hair (Shelly) is the first to speak. She is wearing a yellow and black plaid Hot Topic dress, and has cuts all over her legs.
Shelly: Hello, my name is Shelly and today is the day of the Mankin interviews!!
The audience applauds again. A taller girl with brownish blonde hair pulled back in a pony tail and aqua eyes (Kelsey) comes forward. She is wearing a knee length blue skirt and a blue tank top.
Kelsey: We will be interviewing each…well, some of, the Shaman King characters one by one. Alyssa, we haven’t heard from you yet.
A girl just a bit shorter than Shelly with shoulder length brown hair and brown eyes waves. She is wearing a red shirt with a dragon on it and a pair of jean shorts.
Kelsey: Come on, you haven’t said anything.
Alyssa: My name is Alyssa and welcome to the interview…thing.
Shelly: She’s here mostly for sanity purposes…And because the Authoress hasn’t used her in a fic yet.
Audience member 1: WHO NEEDS SANITY!?
The crowd erupts in cheers again.
Shelly: There will need to be some sanity, believe me…Alyssa’s only slightly sane, and that’s why we have our top-notch security system.
Alyssa: SLIGHTLY SANE!?
Kelsey: ANYWAY! Our first guest will be…Alyssa, why don’t you say it?
Alyssa glares at Kelsey, realizing that her two co-hostesses will make her talk as much as possible.
Alyssa: Our first guest will be…Zeke Asakura!
Silence…Crickets…Bomb going off.
Audience member 78: BOO!
Shelly elbows her co-hostess and mouths something to her.
Alyssa: OOPS! I mean, our first guest will be Shaman King’s very own Asakura Hao!
The audience once again erupts with applause. Shelly then turns to whisper to her co-hostesses.
Shelly: All right you guys, I know it’s tempting to use the dub names…but remember…4Kids is BAD! And I don’t want to think of what would happen if we called him ‘Zeke’ to his face.
Kelsey: By the way, why are we interviewing Hao first? Why not Yoh? Or Anna? Or Manta?
Shelly: Well, you know, creating a Shaman Only world is very time-consuming…he has a busy schedule.
Asakura Hao then enters the room with his little minion Opacho. Their entrance is met by applause and the screams of his millions of fan girls all over. Shelly, Alyssa, and Kelsey all shake his hand, and then they each sit down in their chairs that are facing the one Hao and Opacho are sitting on.
Shelly: It’s great to have you here, Hao.
Hao: Well, it’s nice to be here. Isn’t it, Opacho?
Opacho: Yes it is, Hao-sama.
Kelsey: Umm…how did you get in here with Opacho? Security was only letting in one person at a time.
Hao: Oh…I wanted Opacho with me and security was giving me trouble so I…well I sort of…got rid of them.
Shelly: You can say it, Hao.
Hao: I KILLED THEM ALL!!
The crowd goes wild.
Shelly: Yes, it’s good to hear ‘kill’ instead of ‘destroy’ now and again, is it not? Anyway, Alyssa, I believe you had the first question.
Alyssa: Yes….Hao, how did you kill our security guards?
Hao: ^o^ I fed them all to the Spirit of Fire!
Alyssa: All right…and Shelly…didn’t you say something about a ‘top-notch security system’?
Shelly: Yes I did.
Alyssa: THEN WHY ARE THEY ALL DEAD!?
Kelsey: …She’s right you know…
Shelly: Oh…
Shelly presses a red button in between herself and Kelsey. A deep, heavily accented male voice comes through what seems to be a intercom where the button is.
Voice: Yes, Shelly?
Shelly: Amigo, I would like for you to hire new security guards please.
Amigo: And why is that?
Shelly: Because Hao killed the other ones.
Audience member 78: You mean destroyed?
Shelly: I MEAN KILLED!
Amigo: Yes, ma’am, I’ll get right on that.
A clicking noise is heard, and Shelly turns to face Hao again.
Audience member 18: Wasn’t that the Argentinean from Moulin Rouge?
Shelly grins, and motions to Kelsey to ask her next question.
Kelsey: All right, Hao, why do you want to rid the world of all humans?
Hao: Because humans are awful creatures. They are a curse to the world. Shamans understand the world, and humans pollute and neglect it. I hear its cries for help, and realize that there will not be peace until the source of the problem is gone. Humans.
Shelly: Yes, but why do you kill those who do not believe what you are saying and don’t join your side?
Hao: Because I will have to do so anyway. It’s then or later on. If they oppose me, I will have to kill them anyway one day…so basically, why wait?
Kelsey: But doesn’t that make you as bad as the humans?
Hao: Let me ask you this, if termites are eating your house and you hire an exterminator to kill them, does that make you as bad as the termites?
Kelsey: Yes.
Hao blinks.
Alyssa: No, I don’t think it does. If termites are eating your home, you can kill them because you are defending your home.
Hao: That is exactly what I’m doing…defending the earth and the few good people who inhabit it.
Alyssa: But those are termites, not people. What you fail to remember is that you’re human too. You’re killing your own kind.
Hao: No…you see, I really can hardly consider myself-
Shelly: Actually, I’m with Kelsey on this one. A life is a life. How can you plan to save the earth if you take away everything that inhabits it?
Kelsey: Exactly.
Opacho: But people treat Hao-sama the same way Hao-sama treats people. Opacho thinks that people are bad, and if Hao-sama gets rid of all the bad people, the world will be a good place to be.
Shelly: Yes, but not all people who disagree with Hao are evil.
Hao: Ha…people say I’m going to destroy their world. They want to kill me to save the world that they are poisoning every single day. So, even if I am supposedly destroying the world…what will it matter if they stop me now…because they’ll just do it later.
Audience member 12: Let’s change the subject!
Shelly, Kelsey, and Alyssa: GOOD IDEA!
Shelly: Hao, how do you feel about your dub name?
Hao: You mean…Zeke?
The three hostesses nod their heads in unison.
Audience: BOOOOOO!!!
Hao: It’s a disgrace. What fear does the name ‘Zeke’ strike into your heart!? NONE! None, I say, NONE!
Audience: YEAAAAHH! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO!
Hao grins and takes a bow, causing the audience to freak out.
Alyssa: Actually, the name ‘Hao’ doesn’t strike much fear into my heart either…
Audience: GASP!
Hao: …Really? Would it strike fear into your heart if the SIPRIT OF FIRE was standing over you!?
Alyssa: Probably.
Hao: HA!! Let’s see how confident you are when you’re—what are you doing?
Alyssa has picked up a book and is flipping a page.
Kelsey: …She’ll be done with that in 30 minutes…
Hao: But that thing’s huge…didn’t she just start it now?
Kelsey: Alyssa…is the world’s fastest reader.
Hao: HOW DARE YOU READ WHEN I’M THREATENING YOU!?
Alyssa never looks up from her book.
Hao: GRRR!!!
Shelly: Umm…how do you feel about having so many fans?
Hao: Oh…
Hao grins smugly.
Hao: I love all of my fans…I wouldn’t be where I am without them.
Audience: YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!! HAO! HAO!! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO!
About 50 girls throw themselves at the stage. Forty-eight of them scream in pain from being electrocuted, and two of them pass through and dive on Hao, grabbing each of his arms.
Hao: Wow…that was…strange.
Alyssa finally looks up from her book at Shelly.
Alyssa: Since when has there been an invisible electrical barrier around the stage?
Kelsey: That was my idea. We would’ve had people storming the stage.
Alyssa: Then how’d they get in?
Shelly: Special people can get in…The one on the left is Cle, and the other is Karesu.
Karesu: HA! You didn’t think the Authoress would seriously leave me out of the story did you?
Shelly: Nope…-_-
Cle: HAO-SAMA! ^o^ Hey, Shelly! I’m special too!
Shelly: Well, you two wait backstage, we’re about to wrap this up.
Cle kisses Hao’s cheek, and drags Karesu out the back with her to wait for Hao.
Karesu: NO FAIR!! YOU GOT TO KISS HIM, I WANT TO!
Cle: You can kiss him when they’re done.
Karesu: THAT’S NOT RIGHT!
Their voices fade.
Shelly: Well, our interview with Asakura Hao is over. Get him a pinacolada and some tacos!
Five pinacoladas and five plates with two tacos each are brought out to Hao, Alyssa, Kelsey, Shelly, and Opacho.
Kelsey: PLAY THE MUSIC!
Alyssa:
…Umm…you guys.
Music begins to play in the background.
A long, long time ago
In a galaxy far away
Naboo was under an attack.
Hao: Oh, I know this song.
Hao sips his pinacolada.
And I thought me and Qui-Gon Jinn
Could talk the federation into
Maybe cutting them a little slack.
Shelly: But their response it didn’t thrill us.
Hao decides to join in Shelly’s singing.
Hao and Shelly: They locked the doors and tried to kill us.
We escaped from that gas
And met Jar Jar at Boss Nass
We took a bongo from the scene and went to Theed to see the queen
We all wound up on Tatooine
That’s where
We found this boy…
Well my, my this here Anakin guy
Maybe Vader someday later
Now he’s just a small fry
He left his home and kissed his mommy good-bye
Singin’ soon I’m gonna be a Jedi
Soon I’m gonna be a Jedi
Alyssa: Oh God no…
Kelsey smiles as she watches Hao and Shelly sip their pinacoladas and hop up on the table singing.
Shelly and Hao: Did you know this junkyard slave isn’t even old enough to shave
But he can use the force they say
And do you see him hitting on the queen though he’s just nine and she’s fourteen
Yeah, he’s prob’ly gonna marry her someday
Kelsey smirks and hops up on the table to sing with them.
Hao, Shelly, and Kelsey: Well I know he built C3PO
And I’ve heard how fast his pod can go
And we were broke it’s true
So we made a wager or twoo-woooo!
He was a pre-pubescent flyin’ ace
And the minute java started out that race
Well I knew who’d win first place
Oh yes, it was our boy.
Suddenly, the entire audience begins to sing with them…except Alyssa and Opacho.
Hao, Shelly, Kelsey, and the audience: We were singin’
My, my this here Anakin guy
Maybe Vader someday later
Now he’s just a small fry
He left his home and kissed his mommy good-bye
Singin’ soon I’m gonna be a Jedi
Soon I’m gonna be a Jedi.
The audience is once again going wild.
Shelly: WOOO!!! IT’S BEEN GREAT HAVIN’ YA HAO!!! GIVE HIM A ROUND OF APPLAUSE!
Audience: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Hao: IT’S BEEN GREAT BEIN’ HERE!
Shelly: ALRIGHT! Well, we’ll be back with another guest AFTER THIS BREAK!
Opacho: Are Opacho and Alyssa the only half-sane people here?
Alyssa: …Alyssa is afraid so.
-----End-----
Disclaimer: What makes you think I own anything!? Are you accusing me of something? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME—Wait…^^ I don’t own anything. I also apologize for extreme giantness...
Chapter one.
Audience: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!! KELSEY! SHELLY! ALYSSA!
Three girls run to the center stage and the crowd goes wild. A short girl with green eyes, glasses, and shoulder length blonde hair (Shelly) is the first to speak. She is wearing a yellow and black plaid Hot Topic dress, and has cuts all over her legs.
Shelly: Hello, my name is Shelly and today is the day of the Mankin interviews!!
The audience applauds again. A taller girl with brownish blonde hair pulled back in a pony tail and aqua eyes (Kelsey) comes forward. She is wearing a knee length blue skirt and a blue tank top.
Kelsey: We will be interviewing each…well, some of, the Shaman King characters one by one. Alyssa, we haven’t heard from you yet.
A girl just a bit shorter than Shelly with shoulder length brown hair and brown eyes waves. She is wearing a red shirt with a dragon on it and a pair of jean shorts.
Kelsey: Come on, you haven’t said anything.
Alyssa: My name is Alyssa and welcome to the interview…thing.
Shelly: She’s here mostly for sanity purposes…And because the Authoress hasn’t used her in a fic yet.
Audience member 1: WHO NEEDS SANITY!?
The crowd erupts in cheers again.
Shelly: There will need to be some sanity, believe me…Alyssa’s only slightly sane, and that’s why we have our top-notch security system.
Alyssa: SLIGHTLY SANE!?
Kelsey: ANYWAY! Our first guest will be…Alyssa, why don’t you say it?
Alyssa glares at Kelsey, realizing that her two co-hostesses will make her talk as much as possible.
Alyssa: Our first guest will be…Zeke Asakura!
Silence…Crickets…Bomb going off.
Audience member 78: BOO!
Shelly elbows her co-hostess and mouths something to her.
Alyssa: OOPS! I mean, our first guest will be Shaman King’s very own Asakura Hao!
The audience once again erupts with applause. Shelly then turns to whisper to her co-hostesses.
Shelly: All right you guys, I know it’s tempting to use the dub names…but remember…4Kids is BAD! And I don’t want to think of what would happen if we called him ‘Zeke’ to his face.
Kelsey: By the way, why are we interviewing Hao first? Why not Yoh? Or Anna? Or Manta?
Shelly: Well, you know, creating a Shaman Only world is very time-consuming…he has a busy schedule.
Asakura Hao then enters the room with his little minion Opacho. Their entrance is met by applause and the screams of his millions of fan girls all over. Shelly, Alyssa, and Kelsey all shake his hand, and then they each sit down in their chairs that are facing the one Hao and Opacho are sitting on.
Shelly: It’s great to have you here, Hao.
Hao: Well, it’s nice to be here. Isn’t it, Opacho?
Opacho: Yes it is, Hao-sama.
Kelsey: Umm…how did you get in here with Opacho? Security was only letting in one person at a time.
Hao: Oh…I wanted Opacho with me and security was giving me trouble so I…well I sort of…got rid of them.
Shelly: You can say it, Hao.
Hao: I KILLED THEM ALL!!
The crowd goes wild.
Shelly: Yes, it’s good to hear ‘kill’ instead of ‘destroy’ now and again, is it not? Anyway, Alyssa, I believe you had the first question.
Alyssa: Yes….Hao, how did you kill our security guards?
Hao: ^o^ I fed them all to the Spirit of Fire!
Alyssa: All right…and Shelly…didn’t you say something about a ‘top-notch security system’?
Shelly: Yes I did.
Alyssa: THEN WHY ARE THEY ALL DEAD!?
Kelsey: …She’s right you know…
Shelly: Oh…
Shelly presses a red button in between herself and Kelsey. A deep, heavily accented male voice comes through what seems to be a intercom where the button is.
Voice: Yes, Shelly?
Shelly: Amigo, I would like for you to hire new security guards please.
Amigo: And why is that?
Shelly: Because Hao killed the other ones.
Audience member 78: You mean destroyed?
Shelly: I MEAN KILLED!
Amigo: Yes, ma’am, I’ll get right on that.
A clicking noise is heard, and Shelly turns to face Hao again.
Audience member 18: Wasn’t that the Argentinean from Moulin Rouge?
Shelly grins, and motions to Kelsey to ask her next question.
Kelsey: All right, Hao, why do you want to rid the world of all humans?
Hao: Because humans are awful creatures. They are a curse to the world. Shamans understand the world, and humans pollute and neglect it. I hear its cries for help, and realize that there will not be peace until the source of the problem is gone. Humans.
Shelly: Yes, but why do you kill those who do not believe what you are saying and don’t join your side?
Hao: Because I will have to do so anyway. It’s then or later on. If they oppose me, I will have to kill them anyway one day…so basically, why wait?
Kelsey: But doesn’t that make you as bad as the humans?
Hao: Let me ask you this, if termites are eating your house and you hire an exterminator to kill them, does that make you as bad as the termites?
Kelsey: Yes.
Hao blinks.
Alyssa: No, I don’t think it does. If termites are eating your home, you can kill them because you are defending your home.
Hao: That is exactly what I’m doing…defending the earth and the few good people who inhabit it.
Alyssa: But those are termites, not people. What you fail to remember is that you’re human too. You’re killing your own kind.
Hao: No…you see, I really can hardly consider myself-
Shelly: Actually, I’m with Kelsey on this one. A life is a life. How can you plan to save the earth if you take away everything that inhabits it?
Kelsey: Exactly.
Opacho: But people treat Hao-sama the same way Hao-sama treats people. Opacho thinks that people are bad, and if Hao-sama gets rid of all the bad people, the world will be a good place to be.
Shelly: Yes, but not all people who disagree with Hao are evil.
Hao: Ha…people say I’m going to destroy their world. They want to kill me to save the world that they are poisoning every single day. So, even if I am supposedly destroying the world…what will it matter if they stop me now…because they’ll just do it later.
Audience member 12: Let’s change the subject!
Shelly, Kelsey, and Alyssa: GOOD IDEA!
Shelly: Hao, how do you feel about your dub name?
Hao: You mean…Zeke?
The three hostesses nod their heads in unison.
Audience: BOOOOOO!!!
Hao: It’s a disgrace. What fear does the name ‘Zeke’ strike into your heart!? NONE! None, I say, NONE!
Audience: YEAAAAHH! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO!
Hao grins and takes a bow, causing the audience to freak out.
Alyssa: Actually, the name ‘Hao’ doesn’t strike much fear into my heart either…
Audience: GASP!
Hao: …Really? Would it strike fear into your heart if the SIPRIT OF FIRE was standing over you!?
Alyssa: Probably.
Hao: HA!! Let’s see how confident you are when you’re—what are you doing?
Alyssa has picked up a book and is flipping a page.
Kelsey: …She’ll be done with that in 30 minutes…
Hao: But that thing’s huge…didn’t she just start it now?
Kelsey: Alyssa…is the world’s fastest reader.
Hao: HOW DARE YOU READ WHEN I’M THREATENING YOU!?
Alyssa never looks up from her book.
Hao: GRRR!!!
Shelly: Umm…how do you feel about having so many fans?
Hao: Oh…
Hao grins smugly.
Hao: I love all of my fans…I wouldn’t be where I am without them.
Audience: YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!! HAO! HAO!! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO! HAO!
About 50 girls throw themselves at the stage. Forty-eight of them scream in pain from being electrocuted, and two of them pass through and dive on Hao, grabbing each of his arms.
Hao: Wow…that was…strange.
Alyssa finally looks up from her book at Shelly.
Alyssa: Since when has there been an invisible electrical barrier around the stage?
Kelsey: That was my idea. We would’ve had people storming the stage.
Alyssa: Then how’d they get in?
Shelly: Special people can get in…The one on the left is Cle, and the other is Karesu.
Karesu: HA! You didn’t think the Authoress would seriously leave me out of the story did you?
Shelly: Nope…-_-
Cle: HAO-SAMA! ^o^ Hey, Shelly! I’m special too!
Shelly: Well, you two wait backstage, we’re about to wrap this up.
Cle kisses Hao’s cheek, and drags Karesu out the back with her to wait for Hao.
Karesu: NO FAIR!! YOU GOT TO KISS HIM, I WANT TO!
Cle: You can kiss him when they’re done.
Karesu: THAT’S NOT RIGHT!
Their voices fade.
Shelly: Well, our interview with Asakura Hao is over. Get him a pinacolada and some tacos!
Five pinacoladas and five plates with two tacos each are brought out to Hao, Alyssa, Kelsey, Shelly, and Opacho.
Kelsey: PLAY THE MUSIC!
Alyssa:
…Umm…you guys.Music begins to play in the background.
A long, long time ago
In a galaxy far away
Naboo was under an attack.
Hao: Oh, I know this song.
Hao sips his pinacolada.
And I thought me and Qui-Gon Jinn
Could talk the federation into
Maybe cutting them a little slack.
Shelly: But their response it didn’t thrill us.
Hao decides to join in Shelly’s singing.
Hao and Shelly: They locked the doors and tried to kill us.
We escaped from that gas
And met Jar Jar at Boss Nass
We took a bongo from the scene and went to Theed to see the queen
We all wound up on Tatooine
That’s where
We found this boy…
Well my, my this here Anakin guy
Maybe Vader someday later
Now he’s just a small fry
He left his home and kissed his mommy good-bye
Singin’ soon I’m gonna be a Jedi
Soon I’m gonna be a Jedi
Alyssa: Oh God no…
Kelsey smiles as she watches Hao and Shelly sip their pinacoladas and hop up on the table singing.
Shelly and Hao: Did you know this junkyard slave isn’t even old enough to shave
But he can use the force they say
And do you see him hitting on the queen though he’s just nine and she’s fourteen
Yeah, he’s prob’ly gonna marry her someday
Kelsey smirks and hops up on the table to sing with them.
Hao, Shelly, and Kelsey: Well I know he built C3PO
And I’ve heard how fast his pod can go
And we were broke it’s true
So we made a wager or twoo-woooo!
He was a pre-pubescent flyin’ ace
And the minute java started out that race
Well I knew who’d win first place
Oh yes, it was our boy.
Suddenly, the entire audience begins to sing with them…except Alyssa and Opacho.
Hao, Shelly, Kelsey, and the audience: We were singin’
My, my this here Anakin guy
Maybe Vader someday later
Now he’s just a small fry
He left his home and kissed his mommy good-bye
Singin’ soon I’m gonna be a Jedi
Soon I’m gonna be a Jedi.
The audience is once again going wild.
Shelly: WOOO!!! IT’S BEEN GREAT HAVIN’ YA HAO!!! GIVE HIM A ROUND OF APPLAUSE!
Audience: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Hao: IT’S BEEN GREAT BEIN’ HERE!
Shelly: ALRIGHT! Well, we’ll be back with another guest AFTER THIS BREAK!
Opacho: Are Opacho and Alyssa the only half-sane people here?
Alyssa: …Alyssa is afraid so.
-----End-----
Disclaimer: What makes you think I own anything!? Are you accusing me of something? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME—Wait…^^ I don’t own anything. I also apologize for extreme giantness...
Hai guyz.
Shibayama Junpei!
